Of the one hundred or so dates I had between August 2014 and March 2015, I was only stood up once. I don’t know if that’s good or bad. It is what it is.


Dude was adorable. 28 years old, possibly a model. There were 5 photos linked in his Tinder profile. I should have been a little suspicious that all photos looked professional. Possibly the biggest red flag that I ignored, though, is that he left his profile blank.

I am just going to put his photo out there. I don’t care if he sees it. No sense in protecting the guilty. He should be ashamed of himself!

2014-12-22 14.04.00

We made plans in late December to go bowling. We opted out of the Tinder app and exchanged phone numbers for texting. He was very sweet and was a conscientious texter. He asked about my kids (big bonus!) and even expressed concern when one was sick. He checked in a couple more times before our date.

I was looking forward to meeting him.

The bowling alley was near the ballpark. Parking is hard to find and expensive in that neighborhood so I took an Uber. I arrived on time and took a seat in the bar at the front of the bowling alley. I ordered a beer to nurse while I waited.

5 minutes went by, then 10. I texted him asking if he was nearby. “Yes, almost there” he replied. 15 minutes later and there was still no sign of him but most unusual of all was that he was text silent.

Finally, 25 minutes late, he sent a text saying he was outside and could I meet him out there?

The entire front of the bowling alley is glass. The bar is just inside the front door. I turned around while seated there at the bar and saw no one standing outside. It was a cold night so no one in their right mind would just stand outside waiting for no good reason.

I texted him, “I’m sitting at the bar with a beer. Why don’t you come inside? I’m just inside the door at the bar.”

He replied, “I’ll wait outside.”

What the fuck?! I was pissed off and out of patience.

I responded, “I am not meeting you outside!” I was starting to get a little concerned. What kind of game was this?!

I spoke with the bouncer and explained my situation, asking him if he’d noticed any suspicious activity outside or if anyone seemed to be standing around waiting. He went outside, looked down the street both ways, and reported back to me that there was nobody standing around outside.

I was freaked out. I texted Mars and explained the situation, giving him a heads up in case I didn’t arrive at home later that he should call the police.

I didn’t feel safe leaving the bowling alley any time soon, in case I was being watched, so I told him I’d hang out for an hour or so.

Was I going to be abducted or was this just a nasty joke, played by someone sitting across town at his computer laughing his ass off? Yep, he probably had a fake profile and I was probably being catfished.

Anyone recognize this guy? He probably is a model….

Fortunately, there was a friendly guy sitting next to me that struck up a conversation. He noticed that I’d been there a while and asked if I’d been stood up. “Uh, actually… yes, I have.” We both laughed.

He was a 26 year old Italian guy that lived in the neighborhood. He pegged me for 28 years old. “Nope, 44” and we both laughed again.

When I told him I had to kill some time, he suggested we play some pool (he was waiting for a couple friends). He bought me another beer and we played 3 games of pool for the next hour-and-a-half.

Afterward, I asked him if he could chaperone me outside while I waited for my Uber. The coast was clear; no sign of Stand Up Vince. We said goodbye and went our separate ways.

Once at home, I texted Vince “What the hell was that about?!” No response.

And that was it.

Shockingly, 3 months later I got a text from him out of the blue. It said, “Hey, how are you?”

Really?! I ignored and deleted. Unbelievable.