Life with Texas is awesome. I am happier than I have ever been and feel incredibly lucky. We spend every spare minute outside of work together. He is my best friend and I adore him.
We’ve had 3 major breakups since becoming a couple over a year ago. This time feels different and I think I’ve finally pinpointed why. Part of it was me; I wasn’t quite ready to move from marriage into a serious relationship so quickly. I was reeling. Hindsight is 20/20.
But I mainly attribute our success this time around to Weekly Check-Ins. We set aside a chunk of time after dinner every Wednesday to discuss anything that is bothering us. We do it on Wednesday night because I don’t have the kids and therefore have quiet and privacy.
This works so well for us because we are both the type to hold onto things that are bothering us until it affects our behavior… which in turns pisses off the other person and causes resentment.
We deliberately don’t want to talk about the issue in the heat of the moment when we’re upset and could say something hurtful. So we save it for our Wednesday Check-In.
It’s been working beautifully. The kicker: Last week I didn’t even have anything to discuss on my end.
All the issues and “red flags” that bothered me last year are completely gone. Vanished. It’s not even the same relationship. I think about what we went through early on in our relationship and can’t believe how far we have come. We have both transformed.
I fall more in love with him every day. For the first time in my life, I feel nurtured in a relationship.
If you use the check-in method, is it working well for you?
If you don’t currently use it, try it out and report back!