I sent my heartfelt and carefully curated 2nd draft text to Joaquin this afternoon. I did not send my “WTF is wrong with you” 1st draft. (OK, that’s not what it said but it was pretty confrontational.)

This is the text I sent:

Hi Joaquin. How are you?? I’d love to talk with you or see you. You know I miss you.

I’m trying to be respectful of your time and feelings by giving you the space you wanted…but now I’m starting to worry that you don’t want any contact at all. This contradicts what you’ve told me before about wanting to be in my life no matter what. I’m struggling.

Can you help me understand? I think we have a special connection. I admire so many things about you, and I still want you in my life.

And… surprise! I’ve already heard back from him. It was a long text and gave me warm fuzzies.

He said he thinks about me a lot. He said all sorts of sweet things: I’m kind, supportive, have a strong work ethic, etc. He said his bar exam is in 6 weeks and he promises to reach out afterward so that we can reconnect.

I thanked him for responding, wished him well on the bar, and told him I’d leave him alone now.

I feel so much better. I’m at peace. I now no longer wonder about whether or not he ever plans to contact me again.

I will not be mentioning Joaquin again, at least until March. You’re welcome.