Today my son and I went to look at a home for sale in Hayden’s neighborhood. I’ve been keeping an eye on the real estate market for over two years so when I saw this 5-bedroom amazingly renovated single-family home priced within my budget (an anomaly!) I knew I had to check it out. I usually only see 2-bedroom fixer-uppers in iffy neighborhoods within my price range. Granted, this 5-bedroom was in an iffy neighborhood…but my imagination was running wild because of all the extra square footage we’d get to enjoy.
Hayden lives around the corner so he met us there. From the online photos on realtor.com, he suspected it was the same floor plan as his place. (Turns out, it was.)
We introduced ourselves to the friendly and inquisitive realtor in her 50s. She asked where we currently lived. I told her where my son and I lived. When Hayden said he lived around the corner, the realtor turned to me and said, “It will be really nice to live close to each other. Is he your son?”
I was so horrified that I don’t think I even responded with a polite laugh. Or maybe I did – it’s hard to know because I wanted to hide. We both said no. Hayden seemed visibly uncomfortable, or maybe I just thought he did because I certainly felt that way.
The realtor made some jokes about her age. She was probably trying to justify her comment but it only made things more awkward.
Then she said, “Oh, so you two are together.”
When I really think about it, though, why would she think we’re a couple? Regardless of the age difference, she knew Hayden and I lived in different neighborhoods. Certainly a couple who was going to buy a home together would live together first.
However, the comment made me hyper-aware of our age difference, and pretty uncomfortable about it. Is it noticeable when we’re out and about? Maybe I’ve been deluding myself that it’s not.
I technically could be Hayden’s mom… if I gave birth to him when I was 15.
I’ve been bothered by her comment ever since. And I’m bothered that I’m bothered by it.
I wonder if Hayden was bothered by it, too. I think that, yes, he must have been, if not more so given that he broke up with me last January because he was so bothered by our age- and life stage- differences.
The house is beautiful, by the way. However, I am concerned enough about the neighborhood that I’m not going to place an offer, as tempting as it is. I don’t think I’d feel comfortable walking home from the transit station alone at night. Hayden insists it would probably be okay as long as it wasn’t too late but I don’t want to always be thinking of my personal safety when I’m out & about trying to get home.
Also, pretty soon my kids will be taking transit by themselves around the city and I certainly don’t want to worry about them more than I already will.
It’s sad, though, because my son was really excited about the home and even picked out his bedroom. *sigh* He desperately wants his own bedroom. He currently shares a bedroom with his little sister, which obviously cramps his young teenage style. Poor guy.
Hayden, my daughter, and I had a great time last night seeing Footloose in the park. Neither of them had seen it before and both loved it. I hadn’t seen it in more than 25 years and had forgotten how much fun it is to watch.
Hayden stayed overnight last night; we slept intertwined. It was so sweet. He left to go home after I made blueberry pancakes and scrambled eggs for breakfast. He will be back tomorrow night for The Bachelorette finale, though. Yay!